Have you ever made what was intended to be a temporary move to make-do and it ended up being a 5 year stint? I was a substitute teacher looking to make extra cash while trying to find myself and I ended up working after school with special needs children and adults. Which eventually lead to working for a group home. I’ve been with the company for 5 years, now. And where I’ve grown and discovered new strengths and talents the journey took me far from who I am at the core. At the close of 2012 I realized how far I had drifted. On a drive home from work, tears streaming down my cheeks, I came to the understanding that I would have to find the shoreline and start anew.
There have been people in my daily life that put a certain weight and guilt on my shoulders. And I somehow let it sit long enough to believe that I had to have that weight.
I gave more commitment to sacrifice, to work…
Less was given to keeping myself healthy, fit and sane.
I stopped going to the gym. Instead of multiple hikes a week and impromptu walks, I either worked or prepared for work the next day.
Gone was the monthly massage, journal writing or blog. Trips to the gym. I was losing my optimism. I felt hate in my soul. And I packed on 15 pounds in less than 4 months. I felt panicked. Fear. Depression.
I am drifting back to myself. Trying new directions. In 2013 I shall Transcend.